Top 8 Tips for Living in the Now

The present is the most precious thing there is in the universe. Don’t let the world tell you that success is anything but a successful moment.

1. Take responsibility
If you find yourself in an intolerable situation, remove yourself from it, change it or accept it. If you want to take responsibility for your life, you must choose 1 of those 3 options. Focus on your immediate surroundings; use your senses; look at what is in front of you right now. Be content in the present moment, circumstances and environment.

2. Always say yes to the present moment.
Accept the present moment, then act. Whatever the universe presents to you in the moment, accept it as if you had chosen it; always work with it and not against it.

3. Live, learn, adapt, and grow
Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. Realizing this, use it to undergo unpleasant or unexpected moments by experiencing its totality and growing. Hard times are meant to refine your consciousness, propelling it forward and shaping it to reach its highest potential.

4. Lighten Up
Don’t take life too seriously! Just lighten up. More often than not, your worries and anxieties stem from an unstable and an unbalanced mind–caused internally as opposed to externally. Careers, relationships, money, school: all these trivial things are values that society forces onto your consciousness. The most important thing in life is happiness; so, learn to let go and experience happiness. Happiness is not something you create; it is something you let into your life. Think of light: it is not something you create but something you open your window to, allowing the sun to illuminate your home.

5. Realize That Love is Not Outside of You
Love is a state of being; it is not outside, but rather, deep within you. You can never lose it. Life gets messy, sometimes covering and burying your innate ability to activate the state of love. Make a habit of regularly cleansing your internal being, which purifies karma that accumulates in your consciousness. Just as you clean a room regularly as dust clutters, you must clear the clutter in your consciousness.

6. Strip Negativity Immediately
The more you dwell on the negative, the more obsessed you become with it. Negativity can start as something minuscule and insignificant; but if left unattended, it can manifest into something debilitating and oppressive: guilt, anxiety, anger and depression. Regularly identify and recognize negative thoughts and entities in your consciousness before they manifest in your mind and actions.

7. Complain Less
When you complain, you make yourself a victim; to complain is non-acceptance of what is. It is the nature of the mind to complain, but not the nature of the soul. Learn how to dissociate the mind from the being, separating the permanent entity that accepts all circumstances from the reactive mind that is deluded by the senses.

8. See Things as for the First Time
This one pretty similar to the first way. But it can be useful when you have a hard time just observing your surroundings.

That’s when you can look at things as for the first time. Imagine it like that, take that role. Like someone who has never experienced this before. Like a child or someone who has never been here before. I like this one and I have been doing it from time to time for years (although back then I didn’t really understand why it felts nice when I did it).


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Signs of a Bloodsucking Frenemy

In most cases, people are highly particular about their romantic partners: looks, personality, morals, career – the standards are high! However, the same cannot be said for close friends; people are not as picky about finding close confidants to share their personal lives with; but, you should not just allow anyone into your life. Your close circle of friends needs to be like an elite basketball team; everyone has to be up to standards and anyone who doesn’t meet them gets cut from the team.

1. Unsupportive
People who are unsupportive of your dreams and goals are dangerous to your well-being. Your all-star cast of friends needs to be completely enthusiastic about anything you want to do; whether it’s music, sports or business, a true friend helps you achieve your dreams. Even if the person is not necessarily critical, an attitude of indifference is unacceptable.

2. Unavailable
If a person is always too busy, too far, or too caught up, what is the point of having him/her as a friend? A friend is supportive of things going on in your life, whatever hardship or difficulty it is. You should be able to call your friend and spill all of your problems; you should be able to lean on a friend’s shoulder.

3. Self-absorbed
The person who is only concerned about his/her problems, always absorbed in his/her life, and never gives attention to you gets cut from your team. A friendship is a 50/50 balance: you support their life, they support your life; you don’t need someone in your personal space who is only concerned about his or her self.

4. Negative Vampires
The negative vampire is prime suspect number one! This person is drama 24/7, always has a traumatic story to tell, always fighting with someone, always dragging you into conflict. This life absorbing, negative person needs to be cut off immediately; you don’t need someone taking your energy away.

5. The Opportunist
This person is only interested in getting something from you, riding off your coat tail and mooching off of your fruits. This person has nothing to offer your life, but rather, benefits from all of your success and wealth. In the end, you will feel used and drained from the opportunities; so,  they…got to GO!

Treat members in your circle of close friends sacred; so, don’t just let anyone in. They need to be strong across the board: supportive, positive, available, worthy of your time. A core group of positive friends is vital to a successful and fulfilling life.

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How to avoid situations that make you mad

Honestly speaking, there is no way to avoid these situations, and they will come out of the blue and give you the punch boywonderhitting right into your face.

For instance, I thought I was going to receive a job offer right off the bat after starting job hunting in that I had a great background and experience most people have not been through before. I was pretty much stuck up and thought of it lightly, but the truth was a far cry from what I expected.

One time, this interviewer told me at the end of interview:

“I am sorry but I can’t give you a job offer since you do not take a hint and struggle to be modest. You are too confident and aggressive.”

It literally gave me a pause; I was dumbfound and did not know what to say in reply. It was the hardest moment I have ever had during job hunting when looking back. All the confidence running through in my veins evaporated instantly.

The mistake that I made was that I was expecting something from them. I was expecting them to say something nice and warm, and accept me without any doubts.

Expecting something is alright sometimes , but most of the time, it turns out to be no good at all in our lives. Why? Because the world we are living in is simply standing on sequences of unexpected events. It is not stable and there is nothing we can use to stabilize them.

When you expect something, you are not thinking about others and all the things around you but only you and your benefits.  Don’t try and refute this, you have to admit it. This isn’t bullshit. And you become a self-centered person. In this situation, when the worst case just falls into you, you basically go off like a bomb. In addition to that, after you go crazy, chances are that the situation will not get any better but will be steadily getting worse.

I am now telling you that everything is not going to go exactly as you wish unless you are God or Harry Potter… hold on, Harry Potter couldn’t even anticipate what was going to happen for most parts in the films.

Here is another example of expecting: When I was in high school, there was this beautiful girl and I was head over heels in love with her on first sight. As a luck would have it, we started to go out on dates. I was expecting her to love me back as I did her, but ironically it did not take place. My expectations just brought the relationship to an end at the end of the day.

She told me that she felt that I was putting her into where there was no way out for her to take a rest, and it was too much.

I texted her that it was not too much but I was simply showing how much I cared about her. She did not reply and was silent.   I learned some lessons from it. Thank you very much.

Another example is that I was expecting that I had done pretty good work on an exam and aced it. However when the teacher returned my paper back to me, it really rained on my parade. I got 40 out of 100 which was not my expectation, and of course, I picked a little quarreling fight with my teacher, pointing out what I was expecting to get. Afterwords, he had me standing in the hall right next to the class room due to my destruction of the atmosphere in the room.

Here is one more example: I was between jobs back in time when I was still in college.  I asked the former boss of mine at restaurant I used to work at for a job offer as a part time worker again. He, without missing a beat, said that he would willingly give me a job since he had known me for almost 4 years. I did not appreciate it; I took it for granted and asked him for 10 bucks per an hour due to my gut feeling that I was deserving this amount of money. He rejected the offer and did counter offer suggesting that I would get 9 bucks instead.  I am little bit of a short tempered guy compared to others to be honest, and it got to me.

Let’s get back to the main point of this article: “How to avoid situations that make you mad”. The reason you get mad is that things don’t work out in your favor.

The most efficient way to avoid these is to not expect anything in your life.  There is nothing you can have control over. There is nobody you can rule over. Everything happens for a reason but not in your favor. You have to have a self control telling yourself that you have to acknowledge everything taking place in your life without resisting against them.


Is there something you can control? Yes there is. There is one thing you can control. What is it? It is “you”.  You the only one you can control in this world. You get what you deserve in this world if you are active and aware of your surroundings.

If you want to get your ex back, you cannot expect them to come back to you. You have to take control over yourself and change yourself in the first place to be attractive enough to make them feel like getting back together.

In the process of making efforts and putting yourself in the place where you want to be, you are going to gain the power to attract and touch people’s lives which makes it easier for you to expect something you want from them.


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New Edition “RedDeer Voices ” coming soon

I am Fumiya Akashika, the president of RedDeer International. This time I would like to make an announcement on behalf of the members of our team.

Date: August 8, 2014

From: Fumiya Akashika (on behalf of RedDeer International)

To:  Readers


  1. Reason why I created  this site
  2. How this blog works


I have been connected with great people throughout my life since I was child. This blog title will be “Great People of the world”. “So who are the great people?” When I ask you all these question, many of you might name a lot of famous and rich people such as Michael Jackson, Will Smith, Eminem, or Albert Einstein . These people are truly great. They archived  their dreams and goals by making all out efforts and working hard on all fronts. They have encountered a lot of challenges and difficulties in their lives, but they picked themselves up time and time again, honing their crafts and starting again from scratch when an error was made. That is why they succeeded.

However, I would like to say that Great People are not only these iconic people but also those who are working toward their dreams and objects day by day. There are a lot of people in this world who are struggling and trying to make it to where they want to be. And it does not matter whether or not they are well-known, these people who are working on their dreams and aspirations are beautiful and awesome (in my language). They are truly worthy to be known by people all around the world, as they have abilities to attract and touch millions of people’s lives. Those people who are walking and working toward their goals have a special aura that is different from others, and life has a special kind of meaning to them.


<Why I decided to create this blog>

With one and only one reason, I made up my mind to create this blog.

I have been a boy who was so passionate and motivated  (according to people around me and me as well), and had always ambitions and dream in my mind, which were, most of time, made fun of and rejected by so many people. They told me:

That is impossible and unrealistic. You have to get back to  reality instead of running toward and dreaming about things you are passionate about“,

What kind of skills do you have to archive the goal, how are you going to get money to keep doing what you want sustainably? You have nothing, just live a life as it is“.

I was sick and tired of hearing those words. It was much more harmful when I was told the same thing by the one I was truly counting on and the one who I wanted to push me toward the goal. I felt that I had to live a life giving up on my dreams, aspirations and inventions that were buzzing in my mind.

When I was the most depressed, fortunately, I met this guy who is now the one of members of RedDeer International, Bobu. He was clearly passionate and always had a concrete dream in his mind. He told me:

Do not listen to those who are discouraging you, they do not realize what people are capable of and what potential people have, and they do not understand you

He told me also:

Go for your dream and believe in yourself, if there is nobody out there who believes in you, who else is going to believe you? It is you.

Because of him, I am now who I am, doing what I love to do. Because of him, I could overcome a depression and slump that anchored me down. Because of him, I feel that I am the capable being I am and that I can start to believe in myself.  Of course, I am not sure what is lurking around the corner, but I believe in myself and that pushes me to where I want to be even when I am in slump and feel lonely.

Will Smith says:

You have to believe in yourself in the first place, since then decide who you are going to be ,and what you are going to do for your dream.

I know how powerful it is to have people like Bobu in my life in order to go for my dream. I believe that if you want to keep motivated and passionate about whatever you are doing, it is for the best to get to know those who are motivated and passionate, and connect yourself with them. It is just one of many ways to enhance your life, but I believe it helps you to think about your life and dreams.

And that is why I created this blog. I am sure that many of you are worried and unsure about your life, and keep asking yourself “What if”. To those people, I would like to introduce you to other people who are successful and passionate in their lives, and who are running toward their dreams, and I would also like you to attach yourself to those people in a variety of ways. I believe that it will help you to keep feeling motivated, and it also will give you aspiration, inspiration, hope , dreams and an idea of what human beings ( you ) are capable of.

<How this blog works>

As I mentioned, great people are not the only people who are famous; great people are always around you.

We will write articles about those who have been working on their dreams and accomplished their goals and dreams by getting contact with them to deliver articles as genuinely as possible.

This is an extreme example, but we would write about our  parents , and our sisters and brothers since they are so passionate and we truly respect  what they are doing, and at the same time, we would write about those who are well-known. It is not that they are famous but those who achieved their dreams and goals, and are admired by people are those who have been through difficulties and challenges in their lives.

We will treat everybody (it does not matter what background they have)  as an individual; as the one who has been working toward their dreams.

I hope this blog will give you motivation, hopes, dreams , aspirations and inspirations, and the power to push yourself and believe in yourself.

Greatness is not this wonderful, esoteric, illusive God like feature that only the special among us will ever take. It is something that truly exists in all of us

By Will Smith

Thank you,

Sincerely yours,

Fumiya Akashika, the president of RedDeer International

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The dream that you are holding in your mind is possible

I do not know what the dream is that you have, I do not care how disappointing it might have been as you’ve been working toward that dream, but the dream that you are holding in your mind, that is Possible.

Some of you already know that is hard. It’s not easy.

It’s hard changing your life.


And in the process of working on your dream, you are going to incur

a lot of disappointment ,

a lot of failure,

a lot of pain

and there are moments when you are going to doubt yourself


 “Why, God, Why does this have to happen to me?

images-2“I am just trying to take care of my children and my mother and I am not trying to steal or rob from anybody”

How did this have to happen to me?

But those of you that have been experiencing those hardships,

Don’t give up on your dream.

The rough times have come, but they have not come to stay, they have come to pass.

Greatness is not this wonderful, esoteric, illusive God like feature that only the special among us will ever take, but something that truly exists in all of us.


“It’s very important for you to believe that

 you are the one”

Most people raise their family, they earn their livings , and then they die.

They stop growing, they stop working on themselves, they stop stretching, they stop pushing themselves,

 There are a lot of people like to complain but they do not want to do anything about their situation.


Most of people do not work on their dreams.


1 is because of fear, the fear of failure


what if things do not work out


Fear of success

What if they do , I can not handle it

These are not risk takers.

You spent so much time with another people

You spent so much time trying to get people like you

You know other people more than you know yourself

You study them

you know about them

You wanna hang out like them

you wanna be just like them,

and you know what ?

You have been investing so much time with them , but you do not know who you are.

I challenge you to spend time by yourself.

It’s necessary that you get the losers out of your life if you want to live your dream.

 For people who are running toward their dream, life has special kind of meaning.


When you become the right person, what you do is just separating yourself from other people

you begin to have a certain uniqueness

As long as you are following another people

As long as you are being a copy cat

You will never ever be the best copy cat in the world

but you will be the best you could be

I challenge you to define your value

Everybody won’t see it, everybody won’t join you , everybody won’t have a vision

It’s necessary to know that, that you are uncommon breed.

It’s necessary to know that you are relying on yourself with people that are attracting people into your business, who are hungry, people who are unstoppable, unreasonable, people who are rebuilding to leave life just as it is, and who want more.

People that are living their dream are appealing to winners, they have attached themselves to

People that are living their dreams that know that if its going to happen, it is up to them.

If you wanna be more successful, if you wanna have and do things you have never done or had before

No.2 , I am asking you to invest in you 

Someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality 

You do not have to go through life being a victim

Even though you face disappointment, you have to know within yourself that

“I can do this, even if no one is going to see it for me, I may see it for myself.”

This is what I believe, and I am willing to die for it, Period

No matter how bad it is, or how bad it gets,

I’m going to make it.

I wanna represent an idea, I wanna represent possibilities.

Some of you right now, you wanna be, you know what I am saying, you wanna go to the next level.

I wanna council, you know, I wanna be an engineer, I wanna be a doctor,

Listen to me

You can not get to the level economically where you wanna be until you start investing in your mind

you might be reading books

I am challenging you to go to college

I dare you to invest timeimages-2

I dare you to be alone

I dare yo to spend hours to get to know yourself

When you become who you are

When you become the person you are created to be, designed to be who you are designed to be 

When you become an individual,  what you do is to take yourself  and you start separating yourself from other people .

“I am trying to get you to go a place where people don’t like you or don’t even bother you anymore. Why? Cause you are not worried about making others happy,

Because you challenge more, you challenge to get to the next level.

I challenge you to invest in your mind .

And if you still talk about your dream

If you still talk about your goal

but you have not done anything

“JUST TAKE THE FIRST STEP”first-step-199x300

You can make your parents proud

You can make your school proud

You can touch millions of people’s live 

and the world will never be the SAME again.

Because you came this way

Don’t let ANYBODY steal your dream

We face the rejection of “NO


We have a meeting and no one shows up


someone says

You can count on me

and they don’t come through, Why do we have kind of that attitude? Because we possess.

No body believes in you

You’ve lost again and again and again  

the Light is cut off

but you are still looking at your dream reviewing you every day saving your step

It’s Not Over until I WIN



Watch this Video 

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What is life to you? What is it? Have you given seconds to yourself to think about it? If you have not done it yet, it is time for you to do it now. If you are struggling with finding out what it is to you now, alright, keep doing it.

Some believe that life is tough and not easy, but when they get over those tough things, they can get satisfied and grown up, and that is life.  It is true if you are loving what you are currently doing now. If you are wasting your time by doing routine work because you have to, then I would say that you are dead in this world.

What is life to you? 

Is it working all day long for something you are not appreciating? Please ask yourself what exactly you want to do. Does what you are doing now lead up to your ideal life and dream in your head?

What is life to you? 

Is it studying something you would not use later in your life, but you are studying anyway to get a job? This is right in a sense. Nowadays it is really hard to get a job without a college degree. It is like people are saying, “without a college degree, they won’t hire you”. Does it scare you?

However, at the same time, it is even getting harder to land a job even if you have a college diploma now.

College is not important, but what you have been doing and how intense it was/is and how much you put your efforts into whatever you like is the important point. It is not even only related to colleges but also everything you do.

I know a guy who dropped out of college, but since he was doing something he was interested in, now he has a job he loves doing.

What is life to you? What are you designed for? What do you want to be?

If the goal of your life is to get whatever job after college, then go for it and get better scores on every test you take.

Those who feel that they cannot to anything better than others, it is time for you to find your thing.

How many old people tell you to do what you want to do, what you really can enjoy? A lot!

Here are tips from the top I have heard

Those who are still in school, I would like to tell you

Find one thing, and start investing your time and energy into it in all respects

Those who are working but not really appreciating it

Saving money until you get enough, and move on and start building new life, investing everything you have

Those who are satisfying with status quo

You are literally living in your dream and life, and you have to start to tell people how you achieved it to people 

What is your goal in your life?  Have you ever wanted to be successful? 

I bet every one wants to be successful or have an ideal life. Why don’t you go for it from now on?!

Yes, now is the time!! It could not be any better time for you to start it!

People are struggling with discovering one thing they are good at and passionate about, but the truth is that they know what it is. It does not matter if it is really vague and ambiguous, but they do know deep down. Do try focusing on one thing you want to do. Do not be deluded by many things you have done before in your life. Pick one! and start investing.

I do not know how you define successful, but there are two types of people on the earth who are successful.

  1. People who know what they like to do, and start investing their time into it, and eventually what they do becomes their life.
  2. People who can make all out efforts day and night on a thing they have to do.

What are you? Do you want to be 1 or 2?

All that I can tell after talking to diverse people is

1. Pick one thing

2. Invest everything you have into it

3. Make an all out effort on it 

I guarantee you that you will be living your ideal life later if you start doing these 3 points.

 Scared to take a step for whatever reason

Because of this, many choose the path leading up to nowhere in terms of making their lives more favorable to them.

Do you know why you got scared? Because you are not sure, and because you don’t have a clear plan to get to the point where you want to be. If you have a clear planefor it, I am telling you that all the clouds on the horizon in your mind will be cleared up.

Ok, here is what you have to do to live your life.

1. Pick one

2. Build clear and detailed plan as mush as you could with some backup plans( long run)

3. Start investing 

4. Make all out effort 

People will tell you there is no short cut in your life to live up your life,  but actually there is.

It’s as simple as ABC

And that is

Making a move toward your life and goal.

Alright now, get your heavy back up from a chair and start making moves.

Next, I will introduce some mindsets successful people have in common.

Here is a video for you

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stay tuned

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Become the Gardener of Your Life

The sage is occupied only by the unspoken and by acts. Teaching without verbosity, producing without possessing, creating without regard to result, claiming nothing, the sage has nothing to lose.

How does one become a person, let alone a sage without, with nothing to lose?

Irony–we are more likely to achieve something if care less about it.

Everything is nothing with a twist.

Your life is like a flower: you cannot control the outcome of its fruition; but you as the gardener of your life can prepare the soil (mind, body, spirit) and provide proper conditions, allowing nature to take its course.

If you force a flower’s growth, you may destroy it. It must grow with its own design and intelligence, in its own self organized direction.

To have a productive life, simply be a good gardener.

Wu Wei is a spiritual blood; it spills from the heart like a razor. When you are in the state of Wu, you are the caretaker, destroyer, teacher and student.


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Dominican Republic

Hi I am Fumiya Akashika. I am not living in Dominican Republic, however I have been to Santo Doming once before, therefor I would like to write little bit of overview of Dominican Republic.

Dominican Republic is home for more than 9,400,000 people , located right next to Cuba to the right ( and is only 1 and half hours away from Miami in Florida, the U.S. by an airplane) ,surrounded beautiful oceans which are Carribean Sea and Atlantic Ocean. Its capital is Santo Domingo where is placed along south cost. This country is known for the first european permanent settlement in the America since Christopher Columbus landed there back in 1492. However there were people who had alreaDominicanRepublicOMCdy inhabited in the land from 7th century way before European settler came, and they were called Taino. As For the official language they speak, it is Spanish , and this can be explained by the fact that Spanish settler ruled this land for almost 3 centuries up until 1821 when Dominican Republic finally became an independent nation.

A Religious they believe in is mostly Roman Catholic which 95 % of total population is engaging themselves in. If you want to get to know more about Roman Catholic please click below.

Roman Catholic 


Dominican republic is 9th largest economic country in Latin America and 2nd largest in the carribean region. Its economy was depended on agriculture and mining for a long time, however now it is replaced to Service of more than 64.7 % of total labor force whereas there are only 5% of it engaging in agriculture as of 2012.  It does seem to be getting better, but in the same breath, more than 2,000,000 people live in below poverty line. In addition to that, young people who are between 15 to 24 years-old, are having trouble finding a job, and it is said that unemployment rate for those people are 30.3% where 44 % of total unemployment rate are consist of female.

When it comes to trading, Dominican republic has strong bound with the U.S., importing 45% of all the commodity from the U.S. and 46% of all the exporting commodities are sent to the U.S., which can be interpreted that Economy of Dominican Republic may be depended on the U.S. to some extents. They are mainly exporting things such asferronickel, sugar, gold, silver, coffee, cocoa, tobacco, meats, consumer goods, and importing stuffs such as foodstuffs, petroleum, cotton and fabrics, chemicals and pharmaceuticals.

Speaking of currency, they use Dominican Peso, however a lot of people accept American Dollar especially around airports, at least when I went there, they took away my dollars without asking me if I had Dominican Peso.


There is no place like Dominican Republic when it comes to culture, then how is it different and unique? well, the point is,REST_bandera3 because of its historical background, its culture is mixture of Native Indians Taino, Europeans and Africans. The most notable culture that should be mentioned is its food along with baseball. La Bandera,  is the most common food in Dominican Republic ,foods made with rice, red beans.

As for sport, Dominican republic is well known for its powerful and strong identification for baseball. it is always true that they are considered as one of the best baseball team around the world.

There is one more important thing that is wroth mentioning about their culture: carnival. Throughout February until 27th of the month, they do have festival in entire nation celebrating their independence. Around this period of time, streets are covered with colorful declarations and is exciting to visit.

Place to Visit for sightseeing

There are many places you can visit in Dominican Republic, and there are also a lot of place which are not well known to foreigners.

National Palace 


National palace is located in the capital city, Santo Domingo which houses the offices of the executive blanche of Dominican Republic, built back in 1944, and this building is considered the most beautiful building in Dominican Republic. There is no way you miss this one when you have oppotunity to visit this country!

Museo de las Casas Reales

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This palace is also one of the most important historical site in Dominican Republic, located in the capital city ,Santo Domino. This building was ordered to be made by the Spanish crown back in 1511 in order to house the main government office of the colony.

I did not enter into this building for some reasons, but there were a lot of kids and adults in this building  enjoying their times when I was there. As far as I remember, this building has more than 2 stories or just 2 stories.

There are more places to visit there not only like buildings but also natures there.

If you want to know little more about Dominican Republic, visit RedDeer International Travel.

1463057_10201248231038463_1022806959_nFumiya Akashika/journalist

A Japanese and goes to Kansai Gaidai University in Osaka. He has studied in the US and is passionate about communicating with people from around the world. His main field of study is English, but he also studies world affairs, politics, and entertainment. He enjoys writing and facilitating the exchange of accurate and current knowledge regarding the world around him. He also enjoys playing piano and football; in addition, he has his own website, podcast and YouTube channel dealing with global topics. His motto is “the key to the world is in your hands, time to explore.

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What makes you mature?

Are you selfish or immature? Or do you think you are well educated and mature?

It does not matter if you are younger or older when it comes to the degree of maturity you have. Some adults are not really mature in my opinion, whereas some young people are smart and know what to do to deal with their lives. I strongly believe that being mature is really important in our lives . It does not matter if you have a job or career or something, it does not necessarily make you a grown-up man.

I was in a bathroom on a bullet train and did not know how to lock the door, so I asked a guy who seemed to be 50- something randomly,

“Hey, would you mind if I ask you to tell me how to lock this door?”

He gave me a glance without saying anything. What is this? I can not understand what those who do not say anything think in their heads. At least he could have said,

“I don’t know or I don’t have time to tell you how.”

I have been told how to behave respectfully to others since I was just a kid, and I would definitely have said something like that if I had been asked back then.

Those older people who have been living in society for a long time do not even know how to deal with these situations.

Yes, life is not always fair. Life is tough and fun. You do not know what is lurking around the corner, therefore you have to prepare for the unfairness. You have to be strong and mature enough to deal with troublesome situations.

What are the differences between mature and immature people?


  1. You do not have time to think and care about others because you put yourself first in any situation

If you think you are really modest and thoughtful to others, you do not conduct something that hurts others’ feelings. I know human beings are not perfect and never will be, but at least they can try their best to begin with. This is applicable to any situation, not only in the workplace but also relations with your friends and people close to you. I will mention this later, but everything in your life is all about trust with others; if you cannot not build that trust, you are done in this world.

  1. You do not think about consequences your choice will bring down the road

This is critical as long as you live in this human society where everything you do gives you responsibilities. Some people do things in the spur of the moment and live their lives following their hearts all the time. I am not saying that you have to pretend to be nice and predict what is going to happen to you at any given moment, but I am saying that you have to be aware of the consequences your choice will potentially produce. And please do not lie to people. Be honest always. If you lie and are dishonest to others, you will absolutely have no choice but to put yourself at the corner of the room in the end where you can not move anywhere. If you lie, you will be covered up with lies all over your body and soul which leads you to feeling sorry for yourself  later. So be careful with every choice you make from now on. Be cautious.

  1. You judge people by their age, appearance, ethnicity and background

As I said, it does not matter if you are younger or older. When it comes to the degree of maturity, it is all about how well you can care about others along with yourself at the same time. I never judge people until I talk to them face to face. Only after a long time knowing them is when I start judging them. I have been talking to wide ranges of people in terms of education, ethnicity and age. It is always true that I look up to those who are “NICE and KIND” and don’t judge others.

  1. You don’t think ahead and say things unnecessarily in the heat of moment 

Everyone has experienced this at least once. You say something you do not really mean, and regret  what you have said later on. It happened to me when I was a kid to my friends and parents, but as you get older, you start appreciating what you have now. Of curse it doesn’t get easier overnight to control  yourself and your emotions in the heat of the moment, but let’s just step back and take a look at the big picture and think in the long run before you say something. It takes much effort and time to learn how to deal with these situation.

  1. You kick yourself all the time and do not take any actions to make it better 

Some people who have people skills really do not kick themselves all the time. They know themselves well and know how to get across their points efficiently to others. Everything they say they are sure enough that is exactly what they want to tell to people, plus they are aware of pros and cons of it. They are following their hearts in a different way from those who are pretending to follow their hearts with a little bit of doubt in the back of their minds. They confirm that they can deal with both pros and cons of a stiuation, in other words, they are confidence in themselves. They can quickly answer those questions which might sound challenging and controversial. I am not mature enough yet , but at least I do have a consistent discipline in myself I have to follow, which gives me a clear idea of what to do and how to deal with people. When I kick myself, I always take an action to make it better and learn from it bit by bit.

  1. You go back on promises unreasonably 

Some are really faithful to their words and some are not. Some say “I will do this for you” and then say “I can not” without giving any reasons, leaving you choking in their dust. You will get confused and hurt just a little bit. If they keep doing this, they are done as a person. When you promise something, you have to make suere if it is really possible for you to do that beforehand. If you are not sure, you might want to say, “I can not do that because I am not sure about it” with some explanations of why you are not sure. Be honest always.

  1. You cannot bear being alone 

There is always time you feel lonely if you live on the surface of the earth as a human being. It is inevitable and it is also human nature. I have been feeling lonely as a matter of fact for a year. I always hope I have someone who will listen to me in the time of trouble, sitting side by side, but that does not happen always. Most of time I have to tell myself, “I can do this by myself”, ” If I do not do it, who else do it for me?” Burdens can just fall onto your shoulders and make it hard to breath when you do not have someone to talk to. However, those who have been through this experiences at least for 3 or 4 years as a total know how difficult it is and can develop sense of toughness. You can always be needy, and that is life.

  1. You have no consistency in your words 

You see people saying something and then later say something different and it makes you confused enough to dislike them. If you are the type of person who does not have consistency in your words, be careful when you interact with others, otherwise you will lose your credibility easily.  Imagine yourself having a friend who promised you to hang out at the park next weekend, but he/she then says something like “I am sorry I can not do that next weekend because I have to do my family stuff”, but you see him/her hanging out with other friends at the park next weekend. Yeah, it hurts you so badly right? So, do not be like that.

  1. You do not realize things you do to make you look bad (or do it deliberately)

Some kids say that they did not know what was right and wrong at that time when they had done whatever it was. It is alright and even a little cute, which makes you feel that you want to take care of them and teach them how-to-x, but if they are adults, it turns into a totally different story.

  1. You do things that destroy your trust with others 

I should have put this one on the top of this list since this is the main point of this article. It is okay to do whatever you want, no one is going to stop you from doing it, but it is not professional to easily destroy your trust with others. As long as you live in this society, everything here is working under the trust and bonds between you and people, in a nutshell, you must follow all the lists above. People can be cruel to those who care about them most. Think about your parents. When you are young, what did you say to them? Yeah, when you hit puberty, you sometimes could not control yourself. People always do this to others. We have to be careful about this.


What makes you mature?

I hate to break it to you, but to be mature, you should be able to handle all the things I named above; however, if you ask me to decide on one thing that clearly distinguishes those who are immature and mature, that is:


Those who can forgive others are the ones who are mature.

Of course, it is not really easy. To forgive others means to let everything that has hurt you a lot go for good .

You cannot rub it in anymore.

You cannot even talk about it for the rest of your life to those who did bad to you.

You cannot ask all the details and reasons why they did it to you once you forgive them.

After the vary moment you forgive them, it is going to be the battle against yourself from then.

You have to deal with all the emotions inside of you, trying to let everything go.

Sometimes you have to pretend that you are doing fine and  act friendly in the process of rebuilding relations with others even though you are not still sure if you digested everything already.

It is one thing to forgive, but it is another thing to forget.

If you can do both of them at the same time, you are really mature.

It takes times, but at least if you can forgive others no matter what, people can tell that you are mature.

You can forgive because you are strong.

Be strong, boys and girls.

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Do British police carry guns?

This is a simple question about a complex and controversial topic. Historically, use of firearms was dependent on the current situation and the nation’s temperament. In the late nineteen hundreds, night patrols were armed. By the turn of the century they were retired. Various conflicts led to officers being armed, but only those trained and the arms had to be issued by a Sergeant. During the Second World War, firearms were issued to those who protected 10 Downing Street and the Royal Family. Also officers were issued arms in case of invasion by German forces. These could not be used on the public for any reason. Post the Second World War concern was raised about the police’s role and use of arms. Over time the number of officers authorized for firearm use dropped from 17% (post-1966) to around 7% (2005). Heavy restrictions on firearms are not just for the police – there are numerous weapons available for purchasing in the US that are illegal to own in the UK. The list in its entirety may be seen in the Firearms Act of 1968.

The increase of registrations by officers is seen in the 1960s due to the high amount of police killings. One of the most infamous examples is the Massacre of Baybrook Street (i.e Shepherd’s Bush murders). Three officers and two others were killed by three criminals after the men were questioned about the lack of a taxi disk. However, after a number of people from the public were killed by police in the 1980s led to the increased restrictions and the drop in officers licensed leading to the low numbers seen today.

Unfortunately, there will sometimes be a need for armored police action. There are Armed Response Vehicles (ARVs). Molded after a system developed in West Yorkshire, they were first introduced to London in 1991. ARVs are clearly marked, specially adapted, and modified for their tasks. Each member carries a Glock handgun and the boot holds two 9mm Heckler & Koch MP5 semi-automatic submachine guns and a Heckler-Koch GC36C assault rifle. However, these are the exception, not the rule. As a standard (excluding Northern Ireland) most UK police do not carry firearms of lethal capacity. According to government figures in 2009 there are 6, 868 officers authorized to use firearms in England and Wales.

Officers do have alternatives to shooting suspects with lethal rounds. These are called “less lethal technologies”. The first is the taser. The Taser X26 has been in use in the UK since 2004. It has a 94% rate of effectiveness and is considered a stun weapon to be used in final resort. The second category is impact rounds. L60A1 Attenuating Energy Projectile (AEP) is in use and has replaced the L21AI baton round and “rubber bullets” (first used in NI in 1973). AEPs are used “to dissuade or prevent a potentially violent person from their intended course of action and thereby neutralise the threat” according to Acop guidelines. These are known for their heavy use during riots, but have also be used on suspects carrying “carrying knives, swords and even firearms”. Finally, chemical incapacitants (CS spray and PAVA spray) are used, but the range is quite limited.

Due to the about of other effective and non-lethal options available to the average officer, I do not think that the use of firearms will become widespread. Currently there is little interest by the police and the public. Overall, the officers do not want to carry arms as they want to “”polic[e] by consent”.




“Firearms Act 1968.” Firearms Act 1968. N.p., n.d. Web. 15 May 2014. <;.

Keating, Joshua E. “When Are British Cops Allowed to Carry Guns?” Foreign Policy. N.p., 10 Aug. 2011. Web. 15 May 2014. <;.

National Police Improvement Agency. “Manual of Guidance on the Management, Command and Deployment of Armed Officers.” Association of Police Chief Officers, 2009. Web. 15 May 2014.

Effective from 1 November 2009

“PFOA – Police Firearms Officers Association.” Police Firearms History. N.p., n.d. Web. 15 May 2014. <;.

“Q&A: Armed Police in the UK.” BBC News. BBC, 06 Aug. 2010. Web. 15 May 2014.

Rohrer, Finlo. “Is There a True Alternative to Shooting?” BBC News. BBC, 09 Nov. 2008. Web. 15 May 2014.

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